She’s trying to keep that courage To show the world she’s as fierce Doesn’t hurt, whatever the damage Because she’s a fighter without tears Her struggle is hers to keep Broken vows and broken hearts Her scars are beyond skin deep From them she can never part Inside, where only she can see She knows […]
waiting patiently within these walls
mind numbly bored hopeless drowning in utter despair
depressingly desperate despair washed over me again underneath
this mask of uncertainty can’t even breath heartache head ache body pains
foggy minds lossing sleep again its obsolete, underneath my masquerade
of indifference surrounding myself in nothingness
when will these feelings go away?
where is the light wonder of life and magical
sunshine of happiness,
I dislike it when people say oh you’ll be depressed where ever you live , well that might be true because I have a mood disorder my brain is wired differently just because I get upset about a issue doesn’t mean it’s my mood I can be upset and feel without it affecting my current mood .
Belittling how I feel at the moment doesn’t help me it just frustrates and annoys me.
Telling me I can’t do something because I have bipolar or depression or whatever label you want to call it isn’t fair to me as a person
Would you tell a person with a medical problem to stick it out without treatment? Or that living somewhere that makes them truly unhappy is healthy for them?
I dislike having bipolar it is hard and exhausting , you never know when your mood will change sometimes it changes for no reason at all. Other times there are indicators that your mood is changing sometimes you never even see it at all.
The bored can make you feel more depressed nobody understands this like I do.
I haven’t been writing
have had writers block on top of feeling
hopelesly deeply depressed
I despair being deeply depressed it distresses me
I wouldn’t want anyone to have to suffer through this dark tunnel filled with various shades of velvety grays of foggy mindnumbing depression
that deprives of all other emotions
like being stucked into a vortex without a way out.
I weep my heart out
no one cares
slowly I have fallen
down into the gray blackness of
anguishing for hours
can barely left my head
dragging myself through the days
I paste on a mask and hope none sees through
my pain is always bubbling up, just beneath;
I hide the tears and fears
depression slowly pulls me down
lower than the darkest hour
I cry out to Allah to give me relief from the never ending battle
I am bone weary how much longer must I fight against this losing battle
I have fought for years and nothing ever changes
the struggles of depression makes me forget how to smile or laugh
I feel like a big damp cold colorless fog holds onto me