Black Oblivion

Black Oblivion
Have you ever been so depressed
You stopped crying?
Numb
To the crashing
And all you can do is watch it fall.
Simple pains of everlasting
Black Oblivion.
Dreams-
Sucked away.
No depth exists in an endless sick, dark sea.
Life-
Is meaningless
And now forgotten.
Eternally the Bermuda Triangle.
Once you hit bottom, Rock bottom
There is only one way to go-Up.
Sure! Yeah right!-Face it
There is no surfacing.
I am:
Null-Void-Done.

Never-ending Thoughts

Never-ending Thoughts

My thoughts are many, but fragments;
Each one not making any sense on its own.

Haven’t quite figured out how to put all the pieces together;
Perhaps…no, that would be the easy way out.

Each end looking for a beginning;
Each beginning keeps starting over.

Is it the past merely repeating itself?
Or is it trying to teach a lesson that can’t be learned?

The answer is somewhere between the beginning and the end.

Because the end, ultimately, is death

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The Stalker

The rain comes down and goes deep into the ground.
 Cold winds blow over the graves of the dead,
 While they lie silent in their beds.
 Perhaps they have it better than I 
For they cannot cry.
 No one knows and no one can say 
What life holds in a day.
 Death is a silent monster who stalks waiting for
 The last day to see what I will say.

OBJECT OF DESPAIR

A POEM
OBJECT OF DESPAIR
(
By Fahim Firfiray)
Emma is a lawyer
And so is Aisha too
Colleagues going into court
At circa half past twoIts 1 O’Clock right now
They grab a bite before the trial
They chat about this and that
Conversing with a smile

Aisha is in full hijab
With a loose all over suit
Emma’s in her business wear
With accessories taboot

Emma’s really quite bemused
At Aisha’s godly ways
She looks Aisha in the eyes
And very firmly says

You’re a smart girl Aisha
Why do you wear that across your hair?
Subjugated by “man”-kind
An object of despair

Take it off my sister
Let your banner be unfurled
Don’t blindly follow all around
DECLARE YOUR FREEDOM TO THE WORLD

Aisha is amazed
But not the least bit shy
She bravely puts her milkshake down
And gives Emma the reply

My dear sister Emma,
Why do you dress the way you do?
The skirt you’re wearing round your waist,
Is it really you?

Now that we’ve sat down
I see you tug it across your thighs,
Do you feel ashamed?
Aware of prying eyes?

I see the way you’re sitting,
Both legs joined at the knees,
Who forces you to sit like that?
Do you feel at ease?

I’ll tell you who obliges you,
To dress the way you do,
Gucci, Klein, and St. Laurent
All have designs on you!

In the main, its men my friend,
Who dictate the whims of fashion,
Generating all the garb,
To incite the basest passion

“Sex Sells” there is no doubt
But who buys with such great haste,
The answer is likes like you,
Because they want to be embraced…

They want to be accepted,
On a level playing field
Sure, with brain and intellect
But with body parts revealed

Intelligence and reason
Are useful by and by
But if you want to make a mark
Stay appealing to the eye

You claim your skirt is office like
A business dress of sorts
Would we not laugh at Tony Blair?
If he turned up in shorts?

His could be the poshest of pants
Pinstripe from Saville Rowe
But walking round like that my friend
He’d really have to go

Why do you douse yourself in creams
To make your skin so milky?
Why do you rip off all your hair
To keep your body silky?

A simple shower’s all you need
To stay respectable and clean
The time and money that you spend
Is really quite obscene

Why do you wake up at dawn,
To apply a firm foundation,
Topped with make up and the like,
In one chaotic combination?

And if you should have to leave the house
Devoid of this routine
Why do you feel insecure
That you should not be seen?

Be free my sister Emma
Escape from your deep mire
Don hijab today my friend
And all Islam’s attire

Avoid all those sickly stares
Or whistles from afar
Walk down the street with dignity
Take pride in who you are

Strength lies in anonymity
Be a shadow in the crowd
Until you speak and interact
When your voice will carry loud

You’re a smart girl Emma
Wear this across your hair
Don’t be subjegated by “man”-kind
An object of despair

To use your very words my friend
Let your banner be unfurled
Don’t blindly follow all around
DECLARE YOUR FREEDOM TO THE WORLD

 

Hell Is Real

La ilaha illal lahu Muhammadur rasulul lah
Hell Is Real
I went into my classroom,
Ready for another year at school,
I didn’t want the work,
Just wanted to hang and be cool.
I had on new clothes,
New sneaks on my feet,
I was there for class on time,
Went to the back and took my seat.
Yeah, I’m moving up,
I’m already grown,
Soon I’ll be graduating,
And out on my own.
I talked to some of my friends,
We were all having fun,
Said some things I shouldn’t have said,
Did stuff I shouldn’t have done.
I knew I was different,
I felt God touch my heart,
I knew I should set a standard,
But then I’d be set apart.
Walking to the bus,
I was not looking for strength,
I heard the car tires screeching,
But now it’s too late.
I’m standing in this room,
And I can see the heavenly gate,
Oh no! I never prayed,
I thought I had time to get it straight.
An angel walked to me,
He had a book in his hand,
I knew it was the Book of Life,
When would this dream end?
I told him my name,
And he began to look,
then he looked at me sadly and said,
Your name is not in this book.
Angel, this is a dream,
No, I can’t be dead!
He closed the book and turned away,
He whispered-You cannot proceed ahead.
No…no this can’t be real,
Angel, you can’t turn me away,
Let me talk to God,
Maybe he’ll let me stay.
He led me to the gate,
Allah came to me,
He did not let me in but said,
Beloved what is your need?
Allah, I cried, please,
Don’t cast me away from you,
Tears ran down my face as he said,
You knew what you needed to do.
Lord, please I’m young,
I never thought I would die,
I thought I’d have plenty of time,
Death caught me by surprise.
Lord, I went to mosque,
Please Allah, I believe,
He said you would not accept me,
My love you would not receive.
Lord, there were too many hypocrites,
they weren’t being true,
He took a step back and asked,
What does that have to do with you?
Lord, my family claimed to be saved,
They weren’t real, you know
I fell to my knees crying to him,
Lord, I planned to be real tomorrow,
I couldn’t make Him understand,
I had never–felt such sorrow.
Then it hit me hard, I said,
Lord, where will I go?
He looked into my eyes and said,
My child you already know.
Please Allah, I begged,
The place is so hot,
He whispered, DEPART FROM ME, I KNOW YOU NOT.
Lord, you’re supposed to love,
How can you send me to damnation?
He replied, with your mouth you said you loved me,
But each day you rejected my salvation.
With that in an instant,
Day turned into night,
I never knew such torture could be,
Now too late, I know the Quran is right.
If I can tell you anything,
Hell has no age,
It is a place of torture,
Separated from God and full of rage.
You know, I thought it was funny–a joke,
But this one thing is true,
If you never accept Allah
HELL IS WAITING FOR YOU!
So please, ask Him into your heart
Please show this to everyone you care about(which should be
everybody)

Grief

Silence builds an awful wreckage of a person
It feeds on loneliness and creates a void
Gray shadows haunt and torment and torture
A child is stricken and destroyed
There is no sound of laughter or happiness here
the little one has thrown in the towel today
Somber, melancholy moods decay the soul
It is futile to hope and dream and pray
Emptiness builds a home in this woman
in this girl; this child where hollows have bred
a deepening sea of no-whereness consumes
and eats away at every connecting thread
Confusion feeds like a savage inside her,
Leaving nothing considered worthy remains
Destined to walk through life less ordinary
Alone, exiled, different and disdained.

10 Celebrities with Depression, Bipolar Disorder, or Both — Therese Borchard

Whenever I hit a depression rut, where I feel disabled by the illness and therefore pathetic for being brought to my knees by a bunch of thoughts, it helps me to review celebrities — esteemed politicians, actors, musicians, comedians, astronauts, writers, and athletes — that I admire from both the past and present who have…

via 10 Celebrities with Depression, Bipolar Disorder, or Both — Therese Borchard

Silence, Emptiness, And Confusion

Silence builds an awful wreckage of a girl
It feeds on loneliness and creates a void
Gray shadows haunt and torment and torture
A teenager is stricken and destroyed

There is no sound of laughter or happiness here
The little one has thrown in the towel today
Somber, melancholy moods decay the soul
It is futile to hope and dream and pray

Emptiness builds a home in this woman
In this girl, this child where hollows have bred
A deepening sea of  nothingness
And eats away at every connecting thread

Confusion feeds like a savage inside her,
Leaving nothing considered worthy remains
Destined to walk through life less ordinary
Alone, exiled, different and disdained.
Allah Hafiz

Darkness

I’m swimming all alone in a pool of darkness
And I feel like darkness is slowly pulling me under
I yell for help but no one is there to hear it
I begin to see the water at eye level
And I kick and flail
fighting to stay above the darkness
But the darkness won’t let go of its hold on me
And I slowly begin to give in
To the feeling that lies below the water line
The waters start to fill my lungs
The lungs that once held so much life
Yet now they allow the murky water to replace that
I know that this path doesn’t lead to happiness
But why doesn’t someone grab my hand
Pull me from darkness’ grasp?
Because no one knows I stand at the boundary
The boundary between light and dark
So I give in to the thing that holds me
All of the strength and all of the courage
That I once held in my heart
can’t save me from the water
So I slowly slip below the world of conscientiousness
Undetected by the occupants of that world
I don’t want to fight anymore
I’ve given into darkness

Beyond Comprehension

No one hears me, understands me
I speak in silence
Hoping that someone will see my words,

My message
Hoping to find love, it has arrived so divine
I wish for a stronger, better life
filled with everlasting touch
I dream the future, but hold the past
My body is brimmed with so many confusions
Am I really here experiencing fullness?
I must be, the pain is so real
The hurt I feel could never be imagined
But I will pull through into greatness
And destroy whatever faces into me
As I struggle I will fight until the end
Whenever it may come