falling down the hole again….

I can feel it all the signs are there I don’t sleep well I feel sad all the time and now I am also not feeling well ……………………………

I have fallen into the hole of depression

I have tried to avoid it but nothing seems to help not really sure who I can talk to about the way I am feeling ………………………………………………………..

So I’ll begin at the beginning this all started on the 17th of the month of June we went to the beach and I was standing in the waves as they crashed into shore standing there.

I was thinking depression is like the waves it crashes up over you and then tries to pull you down in the undertow ,

Depression is the saddest and loneliest illness it has so many symptoms that start out as small nothing .

Aching joints sore bones disturbed sleep then the depression gets worse the next day

I got horrible news a good friend passed away and left me in charge of everything without telling me now

I have people I don’t even know mad at me.

I have to deal with all her stuff and the drama that comes with it I am overwhelmed and the one place I use to look forward to going to every week has became a place that

I am starting to dislike all because of one  person she is being mean to me because I stood up to her .
I feel like I am in quicksand the more

I struggle the faster I sink

I feel alone and have started crying in secret ……………………
I have been skipping meals just not hunger

And even when I am hunger food doesn’t seem to taste good my depression medication has stopped working

I just want to curl up into a tiny ball and cry