Slumping in depression and sadness that rocked me to the core.
Reality has hit.
My world isn’t the same everything has changed !
Gone are the rose tinted glasses
Gone is the sprinkling of light rain showers filled with the laughter of children splashing in the puddles.
When I outside all I see is gray fog filled everything in muted colors ,
Like all the colors are washed away and then replaced with gray ,
Gray in varying shades depending on the hour and how I feel sometimes I can escape from the sadness and depression
But it’s usually short lived and it’s getting harder and harder to find ways to not feel so bad
Living life with a chronic recurring mental illness is very lonely and at times isolating, Then there are the times when you want to do things and feel better but nothing seems to actually help,
This is when you just try to survive on good enough yes there are days when good enough is all I can do
Then other days were good enough and plastering on my mask and get through the day until I can go hide away and cry.
Dpressedmuslimah 
Selam alaikum, dear sister I feel you.
I am surrounded by my lovely Family but sometimes I feel lonely like the Man on the Moon. People often assumed that Depression is something that hits lonely people in there tiny flat cause they have no family or no one to talk to. But in fact Depression can be INSIDE of just everybody. Thankfully my attacks a very short and I always fight them down. What helps me the most is the knowledge that Depression not bring me any further in life. In fact it is in my way. I´m not getting any smarter or become a better person with Depression. That´s why I always fight it as soon as it hits me. I also hat to fight feeling guilty all the time. I have a very good life, a lovely family, a supporting husband but still I have Depression. That makes me feel guilty but I fight this down too. Stay strong sis, you are not alone.
May Allah blesses you and your family
Sorry, if I spell something wrong. 🙂